When couples come to therapy, it's for a variety of reasons. Some find they're stuck in a repeating pattern, others feel they've lost their spark, and some are just starting out and want a strong foundation.
Statistically, many wait an average of about six years before seeking couples counseling. It's never too early or too late to get started.
I will meet you right where you are in your relationship.
I've been married about 20 years so far and I know from both personal and professional experience that it's a journey of daily steps. In therapy, I give couples strategies to take home so they can practice these 'small things often' that accumulate to make a positive change.
I enjoy helping couples by using a combination of evidence-based practices, including the Gottman method, solution-focused and emotionally-focused therapies. These approaches are all based on years of research into what makes relationships and marriages work well. Rather than taking sides, I will help the two of you find middle ground because that's where the healing can happen.
If you're one of those couples who have lost the spark of sexual intimacy, or are just having difficulties talking about it, there is hope. After 300 hours of training in human sexuality, I am comfortable discussing as much or as little as you two want.
The first steps are often about finding new ways for you to communicate outside the bedroom so you can connect or (re-connect). Along the way, we'll also work on how you two can build fondness & admiration for one another, manage conflict in a healthier way, and create shared meaning.
By discovering your overlapping goals, you might be surprised at how much you both want the same things.
If you have children (from toddlers to teens), then you know how hard it is to raise kids in a consistent way. Sometimes parents hover too much and other times they're too harsh. I can help you find balance with strategies that actually work.
Using techniques from Love and Logic parenting, we'll work on how to combine empathy with healthy boundaries. You may find that besides being an effective style of relating to your kids, it can also help your relationship by being 'on the same page' together.
And yes, that's a fly on the windshield of the car in the photo
- it's not a bug on your screen!
If you are in crisis, please call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline, a free, 24-hour hotline at 1.800.273.8255 or text 741741. If you are experiencing an emergency, call 911 or go to your nearest emergency room. Barbara Jandu does not provide crisis counseling or emergency services. The information provided on this website does not substitute for or establish a professional, therapeutic relationship.
Barbara Jandu is a Registered Associate Marriage & Family Therapist, AMFT 120259.
Her supervisor, Tina Elaine Engel, M.A., is a Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist, LMFT 83970, and is qualified to provide supervision.
Both Barbara and Tina are employed by Christian Counseling Center San Jose, located at 3880 S. Bascom Avenue, Suite 220 in San Jose, California.
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